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Child money.


Guests Post: By Celina

Teaching Kids About Money


Let’s face it; the way the world is going at the moment, the quicker children can learn about money the better.

This does not mean that you should be breeding your small children to be masters of the economy.

All the same, you should instill beliefs in your children whereby they realize the importance of money.

They need to be aware of how precious money is and that they need to save and be careful with the money they have got. Fundamentally you need to relay the value of money.

Then again, this is a lot easier said than done. Most children do believe that money has grown on trees after all. But don't fear; there is a solution.

Cartoons have become parents’ favorite tool when it comes to teaching children about the value of money.

That is right, from watching Tom and Jerry to The Power-puff Girls, your children can actually learn about cash.


A hard work ethic



A lot of cartoons featured on television today showcase how important it is to work hard in order to make money.

For example, there is the show Chowder that is based around an aspiring chef. The cartoon follows him as he embarks on his apprenticeship in order to achieve his dreams.

This illustrates how important it is to work and carve a career for yourself if you are to survive and make money.

Chowder is not the only programme that revolves around this notion. You have SpongeBob SquarePants, and he works extremely hard at the Krusty Krab in order to be frequently deemed employee of the month and reap in the cash.


The value of money



There are a lot of cartoons that are based around family life, even if these families do contain blue people, pink cats, and talking dogs.

Even so, these cartoons tend to show the dynamics of normal family life. You will see that the parents have a job and that they go out and work hard for the money they have.

You will see that the children tend to get pocket money, they are not always allowed their own way, and they have to be good in order to reap the rewards.

This is very much a replication of normal family life. This helps children to appreciate money more because they get to learn about it and its association with their life through an outside perspective.


Money isn't everything



Whilst it is vastly important to learn about money and the value of it, cartoons instill another crucial message, and this message is that life does not revolve around money.

Money is not everything. In cartoons you will see and learn about the bonds between the cartoon characters.

You will learn about how precious these are and how they tend to stand up against all else.

Most cartoons conclude with a moral relating to feelings, emotions, and friendship, rather than who has got the most money. It is critical that children never lose sight of this.

As you can from this article, there is a lot to be gained by teaching your children about money via the use of cartoons.

Whether your child is watching Tom and Jerry or Chowder they will be able to absorb more knowledge about working hard to achieve money, the value of money, yet the fact that money is not everything.


Author bio –


As a freelance journalist, Celina used a variation cartoons – ranging from ben 10 free games to Batman – in order to research for this article."


Family.


Kindness is refreshing.

We appreciate it especially because so many people we meet are without kindness.

We read of parent’s beating children and violence of all kinds, but rarely do we read any headlines telling of an outstanding act of kindness.

So ask yourself, do you make an effort to show kindness?

Or if someone is unkind to you, are you unkind to the next person you meet?

Or do you take your feelings out on your family?

Do not be surprised, then, to see your children treat the household pet with meanness.

Why not act instead as a solid reef to stop the spreading waves of unkindness? The place to start is at home, and the one to start with is oneself.


Promoting kindness in the family



In a family where kindness is shown, each one, father, mother and children, must have a part.

Husbands should not take their wives for granted, but look for opportunities to give encouragement.

Is the spirit in your home such that, when someone says something nice, the other person says, ‘All right, now what do you want?’

How much better it is when the wife shows appreciation for the hard work of her husband and the husband lets his wife know how much he enjoys the meal.

Do you do that?

It is important not to have two standards, speaking with consideration and politeness outside the home, but unkindly, bluntly and without feeling to those who are close to you.

It is often true that actions speak louder than words, so kindness can be shown not only in speech but also by our actions in the home.

It may be something little, something unexpected, but bringing happiness or expressing sympathy. It is not necessary but certainly kind if a husband brings flowers for his wife.

Or perhaps the wife is not feeling well.

It does not take long to help with the dishes or with the children, and she may appreciate it more than a gift.

Try letting kindness be your gift.

The wife has an important part in establishing a spirit of kindness in the family. ”

Instead of being an exception, this should be a law or rule of action for the wife.

It means thinking before speaking.

With this rule for the home, we will find that kindness solves problems.


Kindness to children



Kindness to children is important for a happy family. Cultivate this quality in them as well, and remember that they do as they see you do.

So commend them when they do well in school.

Parents should not be irritating their children, and it is a good thing for parents to organize their family in kindness, so that the children know what is expected of them and so they will be built up by a good schedule.

Children, of course, need encouragement and even discipline to follow out a schedule to be prepared for their studies and to fulfill home chores that may be assigned.

But kindness is not to be confused with sentimentality or letting things slide.

Mistaken kindness can result in juvenile delinquency.

It is no kindness to children when parents do not care about the company they keep, about their school attendance, but just let the children drift and do things their own way.

The children may well think the parents do not care if this happens.

While children, because of immaturity, may not appreciate the close supervision, reproof given to a wise person will cause him to love you for it, and, in time, the same will be true of the child.

Some parents pamper their children by giving them everything they can.

But a survey at certain school revealed that not a single straight ‘A’ student owned a car, while 83 percent of those who failed did.

Surely the parents providing the cars thought it was a kindness to the child, but it was not so from an educational standpoint.

However, at the breakfast table if your child accidentally knocks over the milk, do you think he likes to be told crossly that he or she is clumsy?

Try kindness.

Treat others as you like to be treated, as this is the real essence of kindness.


Conclusion



If you like to have kindness shown to you, try making a practice of showing kindness to others.

The little thought and effort it takes bring much happiness.

A gentle, friendly and merciful attitude is associated with kindness, and it is certainly much better to show kindness in the first place than to try to patch up unhappiness.

So if you find in your family a tendency toward friction or lack of love, even harsh, rude talk, try cultivating the spirit of kindness.

Girl teeth.


Even young children can show early signs of the gum disease.

Unless treated, it destroys the tooth-supporting structures.

So if you want to keep your teeth, you should be concerned not only about cavities but also about gum disease.

And, yet, many people do not realize they have gum disease.

In its early stages, it usually is not painful.

How can you know if you have it?


Signs of gum disease



The most common form of gum disease is an inflammation of the gums (known as gingivitis). 

Any unusual redness of the gum tissues indicates inflammation.

Of course, spontaneous bleeding under pressure, or a “pink toothbrush,” is an obvious sign of gum inflammation.

“Pyorrhea” (or, periodontitis) is a more advanced form of gum disease, affecting the jawbone as well as the gums.

It usually is recognized by the pus that can be squeezed out around the teeth when pressure is exerted on the gums.

However, pus flow is the end result of the chronic disease process, not the disease itself.

Generally, there is mouth odor and a bad taste in the mouth, and the gums appear very smooth and flabby.

The recession of the gums away from the teeth is another symptom.

Excessive tooth movement indicates that the disease has affected the deeper structures.

Tooth migration or drifting can also be noted in some areas, causing spaces between the teeth or misalignment.

‘What causes gum disease?’ you may be wondering.


Plaque formation—A significant factor



Plaque is a sticky film of bacteria, together with partially digested food debris, that forms continuously on your teeth.

It can cause much damage.

When you eat, plaque uses the sugar from your food to produce acids.

These acids and other irritants can inflame the gums and make them sensitive and more likely to bleed.

If left on your teeth, plaque can lead to even more serious problems.

Deposits of calcium salts from your saliva cause the plaque to harden and thicken and become tightly joined to the teeth.

At this point it is called calculus (or, tartar).

As calculus accumulates, its surface is rough and it causes the gums slowly to detach from the teeth.

This leaves pockets around the teeth that become filled with bacteria, food debris and pus.

Eventually, the bone structure also can be affected. In some cases, it seems to melt away and the teeth begin to loosen.

What happens can be compared to rocking a fence post back and forth in the ground—it becomes more and more movable.

Unless something is done to arrest the disease, loss of the affected teeth is imminent.

Is there anything you can do to prevent gum disease?

Prevention

The best way to prevent gum disease is to keep your teeth relatively plaque free.

How?

The American Dental Association recommends:

Cut down on sugar to help limit plaque growth and its irritation. Avoid sugary snacks and sweets that stick to your teeth,”

Additionally, remove the plaque by brushing your teeth thoroughly at least twice a day, preferably after every meal.

And clean between your teeth daily with dental floss.

Since plaque forms every day, it is important to remove it before it hardens and forms calculus.

Regular dental checkups can also help.

Your dentist can determine if there are any changes in the gum tissues and the bone around your teeth.

He can let you know how good a job you are doing in keeping your teeth plaque free and perhaps tell you how to use your toothbrush more effectively.

While your doing your best to keep your teeth plaque free can help to prevent gum disease, there are a number of other causes that explain why some people are more susceptible to the disease than others.


Why some are more susceptible?



Certain diseases, such as anemia and diabetes, affect the gum and bone structures of the mouth and thus can make some persons more susceptible to the disease.

The hormonal balance within the body, too, is believed to contribute to the periodontal condition.

Proper nutrition is also a factor, since the food you eat affects your body as a whole, including the gums and bones that support your teeth.

A dietary lack of essential vitamins and minerals can make you more susceptible to the disease.

There are also a number of local factors that can cause gum irritation and allow pockets to form around the teeth.

These include: fillings that do not make proper contact with adjacent teeth; overhanging fillings, that is, those in which the filling material extends beneath the gum tissue, causing irritation; loss of a tooth, and teeth that do not make balanced contact when the jaws are closed.

Then, too, soft diet can be a factor in the development of gum disease, because the basis for resistance to the disease is vigorous blood circulation in the tissues.

The toothbrush can help to make up for the lack of stimulation due to a soft diet, but only if it is used vigorously and properly.

Much has been written about the relation of smoking and the use of betel nut to gum disease.

Generally speaking, there is a higher incidence of gum disease among those who use such products, especially when this is combined with poor oral hygiene.

Perhaps you are one of the millions who are already afflicted with gum disease.


How to stop gum disease?



‘All you really need to do is brush your teeth better,’ many feel.

However, if you already have the disease, good professional help should be sought.

Why?

Every case of gum disease that has not progressed too far requires a thorough scaling and polishing of the teeth.

This involves the removal of the calculus and plaque deposits on all tooth surfaces above and below the gum line.

The calculus is too hard for you to remove by simply brushing your teeth.

In addition, if you have high spots, that is, if your teeth do not make balanced contact when you close your jaws, your dentist may have to adjust the way your teeth come together.

This will prevent your teeth from becoming mobile and allowing pockets to form.

Also, the replacement of any missing teeth helps to keep the remaining teeth from drifting.

A thorough program of treatment includes the replacement of poorly done fillings.

Why?

Well, this helps to restore adequate contact between the teeth and prevents food impaction.

It also enables you to clean your teeth more easily.

The capabilities of the dental profession to prevent some aspects of this affliction have improved greatly.

So have methods of treatment and control after it has developed.

Losing your teeth is not necessarily unavoidable in old age.

For many people, gum disease can be checked and a healthy condition maintained by appropriate professional treatment, conscientious home care and sound nutritional habits.

Remember, you are the person most responsible for the care of your teeth.

So take care of your teeth—if you hope to keep them!

Fear caused by phobia.


Research indicates that phobias may develop for a number of reasons.

A panic attack, for example, can follow a traumatic experience or loss of a loved one.

On the other hand, many scientists believe that phobias are learned from others.

By observing their parents, children can, as they grow up, learn to react to parental phobias in a similar way.

In some instances, however, as the child matures, the fear can be transferred from its original source and manifest itself in a different situation.

Helen, had nearly died in a vacation-trailer fire some months earlier.

Helen admits:
I have had a tendency toward mild phobias for as long as I can remember.”

Was the experience something learned, or perhaps transferred, in her case?

There is really no sure way of telling.

A phobia that originates in a specific experience is more easily identified.

If, for example, a child is badly frightened by a dog or bitten by one, such an event can develop into cynophobia, a fear of dogs, in later life.

Similarly, aquaphobia (or, hydrophobia), a fear of water, may stem from an experience of nearly drowning.

It is helpful to be able to identify them.

So first of all, let us look at some of them.


Social and simple phobias



Do you know people who are afraid to sign their name in public because they are terrified their hand will tremble?

Or some who are afraid to speak up in public or to attend a party?

Such problems are examples of social phobias.

They are induced by the presence of other people.

Simple phobias relate to specific objects or situations, such as the fear of dogs or of water.

An excessive fear of cats, mice, or spiders is also commonplace, as is a fear of heights.

In this same category doctors will include claustrophobia, fear of confined spaces, as it fits into the pattern of being triggered by a specific cause.

Irrational as it must appear to most of us for anybody to be completely terrified by such basic fears, it is not difficult to imagine how extremely frustrating life can be for those who cannot escape their grip.


The fear of fear



Another type of phobia, agoraphobia, is the most complex of all phobias.

Literally, the word means “fear of the marketplace.”

Some authorities maintain that this fear is really of what the marketplace represents: crowds and a loss of safety or control that one can enjoy in a more confined area.

Sufferers therefore describe agoraphobia in different ways, perhaps as a fear of crowds or even as a fear of leaving home.

As it is so all-embracing, agoraphobia is also described as ‘the fear of fear itself.’

Many victims are immobilized to the extent that they will go to extremes to avoid any situation that they feel could bring on a panic attack.

As a result, their lives become more and more closely fenced in by this gripping phobia until they eventually become too cramped to make any movement at all.

Is it all in the mind?

Some research indicates that agoraphobia may be a physical illness, a disorder of the nervous system.

Psychiatrist Dr. David V. Sheehan, author of The Anxiety Disease, asserts:

"What is becoming increasingly clear is that we are dealing with a medical illness.”

Some feel that there is validity to this medical-illness idea, indicated by the fact that injections of sodium lactate can bring on panic attacks in people suffering from this phobia, as Dr. Ferris Pitts, professor of psychiatry at the University of Southern California, discovered.

This, however, is only one theory.

Research into the cause of phobias is systematically being pursued in many directions.

Some seek a genetic connection.

Others believe that hormonal imbalances may be at the root of the trouble.

Has what we eat anything to do with it?

According to Dennis Charney and his team of researchers at Yale University School of Medicine, caffeine can produce “anxiety, nervousness, fear, nausea, palpitations, restlessness and tremors” in some agoraphobics.

Yet the fact remains that nobody can pinpoint a common cause of phobias.

They are still a mystery.

What aid for phobics?

Can phobias be cured by medication and the vast array of modern drugs?

In some cases, it would seem so.

But here again, the response of individuals can vary as much as their phobias.

Psychiatrist David Burns, comments:

"In spite of promising successes in treating some anxiety disorders with medications, there is a complete lack of evidence that drugs alone will do the job.”

In fact, for many victims some drugs have no effect at all, or if they do, it lasts only for a short time—a few months or as little as a week or so.

Side effects from drugs also have to be taken into consideration, and they can be quite unpleasant.

For this reason it has been estimated that only 70 percent of phobics can take them.

Aside from insomnia, blurred vision, and other problems, some drugs in certain cases can produce symptoms of a panic attack, much to the distress of the sufferer.

It is therefore not uncommon for phobics to pursue more than one therapy in their quest for relief.

“The method which has worked wonders for one may do little for another,” observes Muriel Frampton in her book Agoraphobia—Coping With the Outside World.

In addition to the orthodox medical treatments, homeopathy, osteopathy, acupuncture, and various nature remedies are all on record as helping some individuals.

Personal preference plays its part in the selection of medications.

Even so, it is good to be alert to some problems in this regard.


ECT and hypnosis



One therapy for anxiety is ECT (electroconvulsive therapy), or shock treatment as it is commonly called.

A weak electric current is passed through the brain to induce a mild fit.

It can bring relief, but as far as removing phobias is concerned, its effects may not be long lasting.

There are also possible side effects, such as a loss of memory.

This treatment has now been banned or restricted in parts of the United States and in some European countries.

Hypnosis, or hypnotherapy, has also been recommended by some doctors.

But as Frampton states:

Experience has suggested that therapy is more soundly based when it involves the conscious will of the patient.” Agoraphobia—Coping With the Outside World"


The value of self-help



In view of the limitations of medication, can phobics do anything to help themselves?

Yes, and many doctors and therapists teach that self-help is the best way to treat phobias.

Results can be rewarding and often long lasting.

First of all, the victim has to learn the art of relaxation.

Thorough physical relaxation is essential for the all-important easing of mental tension.

Along these lines, psychologist Alan Goldstein reports:

We teach agoraphobic patients to relax, to use breath control and to stop their panicking thoughts and focus on the ‘here and now’ to help them deal with panic attacks.”

Once this far (and it is not easy, as it can take weeks of patient effort to learn to relax adequately), the next step is to identify the source of the fear and face up to it.

A skilled therapist can help a patient to understand the stages that lead to a panic attack.

Then, step by step, he encourages the patient, in his imagination, to overcome them.

As Alan Goldstein puts it:

“We help them to identify their feelings and get in touch with them.”

Not all sufferers can master this desensitization technique, as it is called.

But it can eventually lead those who do master it to face the actual experience and overcome it.

Even if a complete cure is not effected, the cause, or causes, of the phobia may at least be tolerated thereafter.

Therapists using the technique claim that eight out of every ten phobics who try this approach gain substantial relief.


Fighting the fear



An extension of this desensitization idea is to have the patient deliberately face the source of his fear for as long as possible.

This takes a lot of courage and can be exhausting and emotionally upsetting in some cases.

For these reasons it is often best pursued under some type of professional direction rather than on an individual basis.

Either way, it often brings good results.

Tony Elliott, himself a former agoraphobic, formed a phobic association in Nottingham, England.

To help sufferers beat the phobia of traveling by train, he arranges for those involved to visit a train station and sit in a railway carriage in a siding.

Later on, a short ride in the station is the first step, progressing eventually to a journey of a few miles to the next station.

Doctors monitor the trip and stand by with a supply of tranquilizers.

Results have been encouraging. “I can get some of them 90 percent cured,” is Elliott’s claim.

The same therapy is now being applied to bus and airplane travel and is being used by numerous associations.

How easy it is to laugh at other people’s phobias!

Such fears, however, are very real and call for deep understanding and compassion.

Those who suffer are rarely exaggerating or pretending.

The ironlike grip of fear can be intense and the handicaps experienced completely genuine.

Yet it is not unknown for well-intentioned friends to make light of the problem, encouraging the phobic to ‘snap out of it.’

‘You give in too easily!’ ‘Don’t be silly, it can’t hurt you!’ are commonly heard expressions.

But they are, in fact, counterproductive—and unkind.

The phobic person requires patient help and empathy.

Forest fire.

The sight of blackened, fire-ravaged trees standing forlornly on a denuded mountain is not a pleasant one.

Aside from ruining beautiful scenery, a forest tire destroys vast quantities of valuable timber.

Decades may be required to repair the damage it does.

For that reason humans see in a forest fire great waste of a natural resource, but in the economy of nature it may not necessarily be a tragic waste.

Over a period of time trees can become too crowded and the forest floor too thickly littered for new trees to sprout and grow.

Fire is one of the ways nature has of clearing away an old forest so a new one can spring up.

The ashes and the gradual decay of the fallen trees contribute to the fertility of the soil, and the clearing of the soil and the exposing of it to direct sunlight help in the propagation of plants and trees of many types.

Trees such as pitch pine, jack pine, lodge pole pine and aspen are helped to survive by a fire.

Otherwise they would be crowded out by other types of trees.

An occasional fire that clears away the litter on the forest floor and opens up the leafy canopy above benefits them.

Their heavy-bodied cones are opened by the intense heat of the fire, allowing the seeds to spill out on the bare ground.

Their seeds soon sprout and in a matter of years a new forest has taken the place of the old one.

The time may seem long to humans, but to nature it is short.

The occasional burning of grasslands and chaparral is not necessarily a waste as far as nature is concerned.

New and vigorous growths usually spring up, to the benefit of the many wild animals that depend upon them for food and shelter.

In marshlands a fire that sweeps away the tall, dead reeds clears the way for young sprouts to grow, providing food for waterfowl.

Thus what may appear as a wasteful fire to humans may be useful in the long-range economy of nature.

On the other hand, tires carelessly started by humans are far too numerous and ill-timed to fall into the same category.


Wind storms and ice storms



Violent winds and severe ice storms can do a great amount of damage to a forest.

Limbs are snapped off and trees are blown over.

Following a severe storm a forest may have a devastated appearance, but since the forest is made up of living things it does not stay that way.

The damage proves to be beneficial in the long run.

Uprooted trees and broken limbs gradually decay, returning to the soil valuable nutrients.

In the mounds of earth turned up by the fallen trees seedlings take root and in time replace the trees blown down.

For the many years the logs lie on the ground they provide protective shelter to many of the little  animals that scamper about the forest floor.

For wood grubs they provide food and shelter.

Since the majority of wood-eating insects prefer weak or dead trees, they perform a useful service in eliminating such trees from the forest.

As for the damage insects and diseases do to living trees, this is usually kept to a minimum in a virgin forest where humans do not interrupt the natural balance of things.

Occasionally 'a plague of insects may do a lot of damage to a species of tree, perhaps nearly eliminating it from the forest, but the plague passes in time and the forest adjusts to the changes it caused.


Nothing wasted



The vast amount of food, such as berries, nuts, and so forth, that is produced in the forest is not wasted when humans does not use it.

It helps to feed the wildlife there.

Even that which rots on the ground is not wasted.

The ground of a forest teems with living animals, most of them too small for humans to see with his naked eye.

One square foot of ground may contain four times as many animals as there are humans on earth.

Most of them are microscopic.

Since these organisms need food just as do the larger animals, they feed on what comes to them.

The fruit, leaves and other vegetable matter as well as animal wastes form their food supply.

If they did not feed on this material the forest would soon be choked with debris.

About two tons of material fall upon an acre of forest floor every year.

This material, which to humans appears wasted, plays an important part in nature’s economy by feeding the fantastically large population of animals that live in the soil of the forest.

Their activity contributes to its fertility.

Bacteria decompose the debris, liberating the chemicals in it that are vital to plant growth.

During their short life-span bacteria decompose a quantity of matter every day that is equal to 100 to 1,000 times their own weight.

The ammonia compounds that result from decomposition are changed into valuable nitrates, which are vital to plant life, as that is the only source most plants have for indispensable nitrogen.

Other chemical substances that result from the breaking down of complex carbohydrates and proteins in the dead matter are not wasted but are absorbed by plant roots and used to produce plant tissue that, in turn, provides food for the many animals that live on vegetation.

When an animal dies and its body falls to the floor of the forest, the small animals there begin feeding upon it.

Worms, insects and bacteria consume what is left by carrion-eating birds and animals.

In a short while nothing remains.

The elements in the body are not wasted but are used again.

Dead bodies, as well as bacteria, animal wastes and dead vegetable matter contribute to the production of the layers of nourishing humus that make the forest soil fertile for plant life.

The valuable elements in this dead organic matter are not wasted but are reused by the living plants.

This fact should cause a person to feel less distressed at the sight of rotting fruit lying on the ground around a fruit tree.

Whether in plant life or in animal life, death, through the process of decay, contributes to the continuation of life.

The great quantity of water that rainstorms dump upon a forest is not wasted water because humans are not living there to use it.

Some of it is caught by the leaves of the trees, and when the storm passes it evaporates into the atmosphere, contributing to the humidity in the air of the forest.

Much that falls upon the forest floor is caught in the mazes of small passageways dug by worms and other insects.

These myriads of passageways act as reservoirs, preventing the water from running off too quickly.

They also serve the good purpose of aerating the soil.

A large amount of water that falls upon the forest floor is taken up by the roots of the trees and other plant life.

By the process of transpiration a certain amount of water is returned to the atmosphere through the leaves of the plants.

During the summer one acre of forest may give up to the atmosphere more than 2,500 gallons of water a day.

Water that does not remain in the soil sinks deep into the ground to build up the underground water supply that keeps springs and wells flowing during the periods when no rain is falling.

It is for this reason that forests play an important part in the water economy of nature.

Although water that quickly runs off bare hills does not build up the vital underground water supply, it is not wasted.

It is eventually picked up by the sun’s rays through the process of evaporation and recycled as rain to water the land once again.


Human activity effects on forests



The damage done by erosion is kept to a minimum by nature where humans do not disrupt the balance of things.

Forests and grasslands hold the soil in place and cause water to soak into the ground.

When human exhausts the soil by overworking it or denudes it by overgrazing it, there is nothing to hold the soil in place.

Gradually rains and wind erode it away, and in time the land becomes a desert.

This is the story in northern Africa, where great portions of land along the Mediterranean were once fertile.

The land ruined is now desert, with once prosperous cities buried under sand.

Throughout the earth humans foolishly has ruined much of its riches.

Nature, on the other hand, builds up and conserves natural resources.

The forest is a wonderful example of the economy of nature.

In the balance existing there that continues century after century, with vital elements being used over and over again.

Guest.


To be a good guest is an art.

It is a skill that involves both mind and heart.

What kind of guest are you?

When you take leave, is your host sorry to see you go?

Of course, if you are to be a guest, you should want to be a good one."

It has been said that what makes a good guest is personality, manners and delicacy of feelings.

Such may be true, but more basic and more likely to be in the reach of all is the requirement of empathy, that is, the ability to put one yourself in the shoes of another, your host or hostess in this instance.

Why is this so?

Let as consider a few factors to illustrate this:


1. Know whether to accept invitation



To be a good guest you must know whether to accept an invitation or not.

Even where the invitations is such that you would like to accept it, it often well to express a measure of reluctance, or least not too great a readiness to accept the invitation.

In this way the sincerity and strength of the invitation can be made to appear.

However, should the would be host be a diffident person, or one of humble circumstances, any undue reluctance on your part might discourage him further and so it would be better to answer such a person, “ why, I’d be glad to come!”.

In fact, under certain circumstances it may even be wise to invite yourself, in the case of a deserving person whom you who is in a superior position can offer some special help.


2. Know how long to stay



To be a good guest also includes knowing how long to stay.

Bear in mind that while you may have a two week vacation, it might be convenient for your host to have you only for a few days.

Far better is it to have your hosts genuinely thinking and perhaps asking, “Why go so soon?” than to have them wonder "when you will go?".

The same applies to how often you call by.

You may find it a pleasure to repeatedly drop in on a close neighbor, but if you are not careful, pertinently he will soon have sufficiency of you and disdain your visits.


3. Have good manners



Good manners have been defined as showing consideration in little things.

A good guest will find many opportunities to show good manners or consideration.

First and foremost you can do so by coming at the appointed time and in a way that will be the least trouble to your host; giving thought to what is most convenient to the your host rather than what is most convenient to you.

Try to be courteous, polite, and agreeable.

That is avoid doing things that may offend the senses, be they those of hearing, seeing, smelling or feelings.

On the other hand be neither over anxious to please nor indifferent about pleasing the host. You should avoid extremes but be reasonable.


4. Fit into the environment



A good guest fits unobtrusively into his environment.

You will not want to force you host to listen to classical music if your guest prefers popular music, nor want to dwell on your preference for German food if your host is a typical Italian.

The fact is that what your host serves is an expression of affection, and that is what counts, not whether it is one thing or another.

Therefore be modest.

Modest here means not thinking more of yourself than is expected of you.

Hence, modesty will keep you from offending your host in ever so many respects.
It will keep you from stirring up competition between you and your host and from expecting too much as well as taking too much for granted.

This will make you appreciative and content with whatever is offered to you.

For example, it would be wise to seat at the least prominent seat at your host dinner table or at least wait to be directed to your seat. This will not only save you embarrassment, but also save the host the embarrassment of asking you to move. "

No doubt displaying modesty will save you many embarrassing moments.


5. Sharing the burden

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In these days of high prices that keep ever higher, the art of being a good guest may well include sharing the burden of the expense your stay entails.

While you might embarrass your host by offering to pay for your stay, there are other ways in which you might be able to help from time to time, especially if you are a guest for a week or more.

Having a guest invariably means more work for one or more members of the host family.

You might lighten that extra load by keeping your own room clean, your bed made, help with cleaning up afterwards.

Such offers of help might not always be accepted, but, even if not, they are appreciated.

If you are one of the menfolk, there are yet other opportunities.

Around the average home there is usually is one or more things that needs to be taken care of, especially if there is a lawn, a garage, an automobile in the garage.

Or there may be some minor jobs crying out to be taken care of because of the busy schedule of the man of the house.


6. Gifts and appreciation



You need not wait until after you have arrived to show your appreciation. At time you may want to bring a gift when you come.

For example, groceries is always fitting when your stay is brief; or an article of clothing for your host or hostess or something practical or ornamental for the home may be appropriate if your stay is longer.

A taste and appropriate gift betokens affection and appreciation starts off your stay as a guest with the right foot.

There is nothing like an expression of generosity or liberality to elicit the same from others.

Nor should it be forgotten that mere expressing gratitude, not exaggerated praise or flattery, can make others feel it was worth hosting you.


7. Giving of yourself



It is giving of yourself that differentiates you from other persons and really distinguishes your stay at the home of friends from your stay at a hotel.

After all hospitality is not extended or accepted to save on expense but to enrich each other in the heart and mind.

That is why it is well been said that it takes personality to be a good guest; it requires giving what you alone can give, yourself.

There are many ways in which you can give of yourself.

Give of your company, your association, your time.

Contribute to interesting conversation by sharing things you have learned, observations and interesting experiences or anecdotes.

Here your favorite hobby can also serve a useful purpose.

Often it can contribute to very enjoyable evening.

But a word of caution:

Do not let your enthusiasm make you unduly prominent, usurping the host’s position.


In conclusion



Much more might be said about the art of being a fine guest, but from the foregoing examples it is apparent you must go beyond your needs and contribute concretely to the enjoyment or up building of your host.

In this way you will make you stay worthwhile to your host or hostess - and even to yourself.

But how can you be a good guest to a sick friend you visit in hospital?

Please read the following article:

How to visit a sick friend?

Thinking about future.

Young or old, rich or poor, sick or healthy, you have a future, for the word “future” means “time that is to come.”

And everyone reaches the future at the same rate of 60 minutes an hour.

What that future will bring for you, however, depends on how you view it and plan for it.

Your future consists of more than just the time that remains of your present life.

It also includes how you use that time, the plans you have made, the goals you have set.


Why some don’t care about their future?



Why is it that so many give so little thought to the future?

There are a number of reasons for this.

Here are some of them:

▪ The anxiety and struggle of everyday life stifles thoughts of the future.

▪ The “now generation” philosophy promotes the view, ‘live for the moment and the future will take care of itself.’

▪ Those pursuing the ‘whatever will be, will be’ way of life believe destiny alone shapes the future.

▪ The ‘what’s the use’ feeling results in despair and deters setting goals for the future.

But how about those who do plan for the future?

Their plans may lack objectivity and their future may, therefore, become disappointing.

How so?

Because there are some things that shape human thought that can make a person expectations for the future flawed.

One is inherited genetic traits; the other, the environment.

And the philosophy of the political, religious, economic and social community is constantly squeezing people into its mold.

The result?

Deflection of effort away from a realistic future.


A realistic approach to your future



‘How can I have a realistic and meaningful future?’ you wonder. 

The answer may lie in what Nobel Prize winner John Galsworthy wrote: "If you do not think about the future, you cannot have one.”

Give serious thought first to what the future could bring.

Next think about what you would like to be and do in that future. 

Then take the needed action to direct your steps toward that goal.

But remember humans lack complete control of future situations and must react to them as they develop.

For example, your effort may include preparing for your children’s education, assuming that this will guarantee them a more promising future. 

Yet there are university graduates who become unemployed.

Or you may be working extremely hard at present so as to be financially secure in the future.

But inflation and economic recession can strip away financial holdings.

Or it may be looking forward to retirement with a home and an income that will give material independence and the ability to live out the golden years in comfort.

Yet some disaster may rob you of this hope.

Or it may be you believing that the future will somehow become better tomorrow.

But that “tomorrow” never comes.

What can do when your life does not turn out like you had planned it?

Suppose you are planning for a family picnic but find out that the weather forecast calls for a severe thunderstorm.

Would you not change your plans?

There is nothing you can do to control the weather, but you do not have to get drenched. 

If alternative steps are taken, the family can have a pleasant time elsewhere despite the storm.

For some however, self-delusion may be more pleasant than facing reality, but it does not provide a living, feed loved ones, or enable one to cope with the many other requirements of life.

A person who imagines things are the way he would like them to be, instead of facing them the way they really are, is not reasoning on the facts, but is building on fancy.

His powers of discernment are clouded.

Those who ignore the facts and delude themselves with fancy are like the proverbial ostrich that hides his head in the sand when danger nears.

However, the realist person recognizes that such ostrich exists in fables only, not in fact! 

The ostrich of reality does not ignore the fact of danger. He does not hide his head in the sand.

To the contrary, he moves away from the source of potential harm so rapidly that few animals can keep up with him when he is in full flight.

Daydreamers are like that proverbial ostrich

They hide their heads in the sands of self-deception and fancy when situations arise that demand a realistic facing of the facts, and actions based on those facts.

Therefore, for your future to be more realistic, be willing to make the necessary adjustments to meet the various challenges you will meet in the future.

Lovely family.


Have we not all, at one time or another, made personal resolves to do something nice for a family member? 

We promise ourselves that we are going to express our love and appreciation for them.

We may plan to express our sentiments by means of a gift, a note, a verbal expression or some kind gesture. 

Such personal resolves are noble, for they reflect an unselfish frame of mind.

However, it is one thing to make a personal resolve to do something and quite another to carry it out.

This is because we may let other things cause us to keep putting it off.

Unless we promptly carry it out while the desire is burning brightly in our hearts, we may find that we will be continually postponing it. 

This usually leads to our forgetting about our good intention or giving up the whole idea.


Don't take them for granted



To avoid failing in this regard, we need to recognize that the complexities of modern-day living make our forgetting a good intention an easy course to follow.

Matters do come up unexpectedly, some of which demand our immediate attention.

However, by not letting small matters dictate our course of action, we will more likely fulfill our good intentions, much to the joy of our family and ourselves.

Notice that there is a need to pursue the doing of good, at all times making it our aim.

Such counsel is given because humans tend to let other things crowd out this most desirable quality.

Yes, we need to guard against the habit of postponing the doing of good to our family.

Further, procrastination or the putting off of matters for another time is nourished by the tendency to take things for granted.

How is this?

Well, let us say that a married couple has been planning for some time to have their aged parents over for dinner.

However, something is always coming up that causes them to keep postponing it.

Are they not taking for granted that they and their aged parents will be here next week or next month?
How true that is!

None of us knows what the next day will give birth to, let alone the next week.

Husbands and wives also need to guard against the complacent feeling of taking each other for granted.

Take advantage of the numerous opportunities to do thoughtful little things for your closest companion in life.

Do not get into the habit of delaying the doing of good that you plan for that one.

One husband was left to care for two children when his wife suddenly died.

He confessed that he took her for granted and now he wants so much to have the opportunity to tell her how much she meant to him and how good she was.

What a lesson we can draw from his experience!

While it is true that husbands and wives owe it to their mates to be appreciative, expressions of appreciation mean much more when they are not demanded but are won by appealing to the other person’s heart.

How can this be done?


Spend more time with them



It is not enough that one should be generous with his or her time in dealing with persons outside, the family deserves attention too.

A person who spends some time each day in up building conversation with his or her family will certainly be appreciated far more than the one who simply brings home money.

And while others may admire him or her for helping others in the community, it is the willingness to set aside time regularly to be with his or her family that will strength family bonds.

In view of the transient nature of life, we should do now what we resolve in our hearts and not put it off.

To avoid putting off what we plan, we also need to guard against hobbling ourselves with the idea that we must make an elaborate gesture to express our sentiments.

This, too, contributes toward postponing the fulfillment of our loving desires.

Yes, planning to make it extraordinary may defeat our purpose.

How?

When little things come up that do not require much to accomplish, we will find ourselves tackling these and postponing the more complicated resolve.

Today there are many persons who are plagued with remorse and regret.

Among them are those who never appreciated what they had until they lost it.

Others kept putting off carrying out their noble intentions so long that suddenly death took away the object of their planned attention.

They are haunted by memories of what could have been but was not.

While it is too late to do anything to correct the matter now, such ones can learn from their experience.

Yes, they can make changes, resolving never to let it happen again.

Rather than torment themselves over the past unfulfilled resolves, they can positively take advantage of the opportunities they now have to do good to their family.

The lessons here apply to all of us.

We should do the good that we plan to do now while we have the opportunity.

One daughter wisely responded quickly to her noble desire, and she wrote to her parents, saying:

"Dear Mom and Dad. Thank you both so very much. I appreciate it more and more as I grow older.”

What joy that brought to her parents!

How loving and wise not to hold back from telling your dear parents the deep appreciation you have for what they have done for you! 

Why not let them know now how much you appreciate their love, devotion and sacrifices for you?

Not only for our own good but for our own self-respect we need to overcome the tendency to put off doing things, especially that which is beneficial and good.

Have you resolved to do something kind for your family?

Do not put it off, do it now!

Debt consolidation.


Guest post by Andrew



Free debt consolidation programs, can they really help you become debt free?

Have you piled up enormous credit card debt?

Do you want to get rid of debt burden?

If yes, then you will come across different ways with which you can bring back your personal finances on the right track.

Since you've already fallen into debt, you must be looking for a way out to overcome debt.

You may choose free debt consolidation programs to erase debt problems.

For this, you will have to pay a certain amount of fees to the company so that they may help you become debt free.


Free debt consolidation programs



Reduce credit card bills with their help.

Here are some tips on how free debt consolidation programs can help you reduce credit card bills.


(1) Trying to reduce the rate of interest – 


Do you know why most card holders do not want to pay down the credit card dues on time?

Possibly, the reason behind this is the credit card companies charge them high interest rate.

You can choose free debt consolidation programs where the consolidator negotiates with your creditors for lowering the interest rate on your dues.

The credit card bill payments will become much easier for you.


(2) Going for a single monthly payment facility 



Have you mounted up outstanding dues on your several credit cards?

If yes, then choose debt consolidation and make yourself completely debt free.

The reason why you’ll opt for this debt solution is you can go for a single monthly payment facility.

As such, you won’t have to make the debt payments separately and thus, not handle various creditors at a time.


(3) The consolidator negotiating with the creditors 


It is not so easy to negotiate with your creditors when you do not have the proper negotiation skills.

Thus, the best thing you can do is to enroll in a debt consolidation program where the consolidator will do the work on your behalf.

He will negotiate with your creditors and ask them to diminish the interest rate by as much as they can. You’ll be able to pay off debts soon.


(4) Leaving a negative impact on your credit score 


Have you missed out any of your credit card bill payments?

If yes, then be assured that your credit score has dropped down by several points and your score has got hurt.

Other than this, if you've delayed in making even a single payment, this will leave a negative impact too. Sign up with debt consolidation and try to improve credit score.


(5) Getting a suitable chance to become debt free  


Are you worried as to how you will come out of debt problems?

If yes, then you must be spending sleepless nights thinking how you will pay off your dues quickly.

It’s suggested that you go for debt consolidation and try to repay debts as early as possible.

Debt consolidation gives you a suitable chance to become debt free.

Thus, debt consolidation program is an effective way to deal with your debt problems so that you can get rid of them soon.


Author's Bio:


Andrew- is a financial writer who loves to contribute his articles to the communities, blogs and websites.