Making friends not just acquaintances

Two young ladies becoming friends at a horse race function.
Sociability is one of the most outstanding characteristics of a human being whether one realizes it or not and one of the greatest needs. Heading the list of human beings emotional needs is the need for love, approval and recognition. Who are those who can fill those needs? Definitely those must be our friends."

However, fading friendship has produced an emotionally sick world and people are becoming colder and colder.

This is demonstrated by the fact that even though people live, eat and sleep within inches of others, they have no one to talk to.

They are surrounded by acquaintances, but do not have a friend in the world.

Self-analysis


Now, do you have friends or just acquaintances? Look around you, reflect on your daily routine. Think of all the persons you greet “Good morning” day after day and week after week.

You may be tempted to call them friends, but if you were to take a trip a few hundred miles away and accidentally meet one of them, would you recognize them, or would you think, “Where have l seen that face!”

Life is full of acquaintances. Yes, nodding acquaintances, holiday acquaintances and even those close acquaintances.

But the abundance of these or their absence has little or no effect on your well-being. So why is it important to have true friends?

Value of true friends


True friends make our best counselors. Isn't true that the words of a friend are generally received by us with greater evaluation than opinions however expert of those who are just acquaintances? Why?

Because we know this person well and appreciate that they know us. There is a common understanding between us and we can approach each other in confidence.

We tell our story in a free and offhand way and listen with a not oversensitive ear.

We are able to sift out what is said thoughtlessly but not really meant, and add the savor and feeling that what was meant but left unsaid.

Of course, this freedom of friendship should not be overlooked or taken for granted. Consider friendship like fragile finery, careful handling will keep it whole.

Problems in finding friends


Much is missed by those who lack friends, yet many people still hole themselves up in a self-imposed solitary confinement. “People bother me” seems to be their attitude.

It not therefore not surprising that many are turning to man’s best friend, a dog, for companionship.

However, there are those who would love to have more friends, but for whom making friends is not the easiest thing in the world.

No matter how much they long to be able to confide in others, years of life come and go and they find it no easier to get beyond the stage of having acquaintances.

So, how can you make friends and not just acquaintances?

Making friends


Of course, the best way to make a friend is to be one. Now, do not expect friends to be without shortcomings.

Nevertheless, if your associations are well chosen, your friendship will be wholesome. So look at the better traits possessed by your acquaintances and they may very soon become your friends.

How can you then cultivate friendship with them? For instance, you may be accustomed to seeing them regularly at work.

If they fail to show up at work and you missed them, why not remember to tell them so.

If they are on sick leave at home, an early visit to their home or an inquiry phone call shows your concern and deepens the bond of friendship.

If you want to be a friend to people, show like concern for them.

Deep friendships are often slow-growing things, but they have to start somewhere. Initial approaches may even have to be forced.

It may not come naturally to you to smile at a stranger, but do it anyway. And should you be on the receiving end of the smile, do not take the attitude, “What is he grinning at anyway?” 

No, smile back and think of a few words to accompany your smile if you can.

If you find difficulty in being conversant with newcomers to your life, this need not be a big draw-back. In fact, the great “conversationalist” is often friendless because of his verbosity.

But for better results, be an inquirer and take a keen interest in what the other person has to say.

You will find that if you really listen with interest you will soon be participating in the conversation without even thinking about it.

Conclusion


Friendships are truly rewarding and should be sought because they are sweet and refreshing. So, why not expand your circle of friends?

Making friends is usually just a matter of getting started. Your new friendships will soon make your life even more satisfying.

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